Day 60

by angisullins

Some months after Zeus died, Silas’s sister Susanne was visiting from Germany. It was Christmas time, and many a night was spent next to the kiva fire with mugs of mulled spiced wine. On one of these nights, snow swirling tiny lace dresses over the sage, I shared stories of Zeus. Not just the cute, whimsical funny ones, but the deep, powerful spiritual ones as well.

Susanne had seen a hand-painted sign on our wall. Your cork floating is the only thing worthy of discipline. Having grown up with a disciplinarian task-master of a father, I freaking LOVE this quote. “But what does it mean?” Susanne asked between Zeus stories. I explained that Abraham Hicks, one of my spiritual teachers, was the author of that quote, and that it referred to our well being as a cork. “Our well being is natural, and our soul is designed to keep us floating on the surface of life, buoyant. The only thing that interferes with that is our thoughts. We, alone, have the power to cut ourselves off from our well being. Thinking negative thoughts, or thoughts of “too much” and “not enough” are like putting pressure on the cork, forcing it under the surface of the water. Remove the negative thoughts and our well being naturally bobs back up to the surface. And keeping the negative thoughts off the cork so it can float is the only thing in our lives really worthy of discipline.”

She grinned wide, exposing more than a handful of Cheshire Cat teeth. “So Zeus must have a thing for corks.”

I grinned back, knowing she got it, the essence of his story. And on Christmas morning, my smile reached straight across Wonderland, seeing just how perfectly she understood his presence in my life.

You see, she made this digital collage for me as a gift.

susannekarte

That’s Zeus, paying the helium fairy for balloons to attach to my cork. His job was (and is still) to fill my heart with helium, to keep it light and expanding, to help me float along the surface of well being. And down below is the sea monster, the fears, the insecurities, the worries of money, health, love, career. Those thoughts that can reach up with their tentacles and take us down down down until we feel we’re drowning in uncertainty, overwhelm depression.

He came for a time to pay for my passage. His presence was the currency that paid for my light heart. He showed me the way, encouraging me to get out of my own way. And Izzy has done the same thing.  With every nuzzle, every walk in the park, every belly rub, she encourages me to get out of my own way, to take my thoughts higher, to lift the pressure off the cork.

Zeus is gone. And Izzy is fading. But this print hangs on my wall, and their spirits buoy my heart, as a reminder to be a disciple of my own happiness.